• Home
  • New? Start Here
  • Contact
  • Blog
  • Skip to primary navigation
  • Skip to content
  • Skip to primary sidebar
  • Skip to footer

Real Mom Life

  • Purpose and Passion
    • Planners
    • Purpose and passion
    • Reinvention
    • Retirement
    • Starting a business
    • Volunteering
    • Working
    • Trying new things
    • Ageism
    • Giving back
    • Confidence
    • Encore careers
    • Encouragement
    • Gratitude
    • Happiness
    • Inspiration
    • Lifelong Learning
  • Adventure
    • Travel
    • Technology
    • Trying new things
    • Books and movies
    • Embracing change
    • Fun
    • Holidays
    • Pets
  • Relationships
    • Marriage
    • Friendships
    • Parenting
    • Painful parenting
    • Mothering
    • Grandparenting
    • Aging parents
    • Empty nest
    • Cancer caregiving
    • Child adoption
    • Homeschooling
    • Special needs kids
    • Life skills for kids
    • Activities for kids
  • Health and Beauty
    • Alternative health practices
    • Fashion
    • Hair care
    • Health insurance
    • Healthy aging
    • Healthy brain
    • Makeup
    • Medical issues
    • Mental health
    • Sexuality
    • Skin care
    • Sleep
    • Stress
    • Nutrition
    • Physical fitness
    • Self-care
  • Creativity and Spirituality
    • Faith
    • Crafts
    • Hobbies
    • Art journaling
    • Blogging
    • Journaling
    • Jewelry making
    • Writing
  • Home and Finances
    • Cleaning
    • Cooking and food
    • Declutter
    • Decor
    • DIY Home
    • Downsize
    • Gardening
    • Holidays
    • Organizing
    • Saving money
    • Simplify
  • Coffee Love
  • Rants, Raves and Reviews
  • Bucket List
  • Shop

Getting better at being me

August 22, 2014 By Christine Field

This post may contain affiliate links.

Spread the love

Does it take a lifetime to become authentic?

Maybe. Season of Growth

How many years of your life have you spent trying to please others?

Too many.

As I talk about far too often, this is an interesting time of life for me. Kind of like an older, less energetic adolescence. Lots of swirling thoughts and processes.

It’s a time for reflection, for sure. One real advantage of aging is being able to look back at the younger me with love and compassion.

At the times, during the doing, I was awfully hard on myself. I had to be a great wife, stellar mother, model career woman, prolific author, blah, blah, blah, blah.

When things didn’t go well or smoothly, I was so quick to find fault with myself and to condemn. Many days I felt like I couldn’t do anything right, much less multi-task at life.

On the other side of crises is perspective. The flip side of self-criticism is acceptance.

I can look back and see where each phase filled with crap led to growth. Each hard time made me deeper and stronger. Each precipice of disaster led to greater faith.

When I recall the missteps and disasters, I can see that I was doing the best I could. The today-me would reach back and give the yesterday-me a great big hug and tell her she was just fine. I recall some therapist telling me that viewing myself with compassion, rather than the disgust I had become so accustomed to, was the hallmark of healing and something the shrinks call integration. For me, older = integrated. What a blessing.

Today I’m the updated, down-sized, dog-earred best version of myself. The shine of the paint has faded, but the well-cared for engine runs steady and strong.

Part if it is that there are so many things I just don’t care about anymore. I don’t care what people think about me. I want people to read what I write, but if they don’t agree with it I’m really OK with it. The freedom to express and live as myself is so valuable that these things don’t matter.

Getting older is getting better at being yourself.

Not there yet. That’s OK.

Just for today, give yourself a big hug and tell yourself everything will be just fine.


Filed Under: Happiness, Health and Beauty, Healthy aging, Purpose and Passion Tagged With: aging, happiness, life integration, perspective

Previous Post: « You Need to Change!
Next Post: My wise son »

Reader Interactions

Primary Sidebar

FacebookInstagrammailPinterestYouTubeTwitter

Hi, I’m Christine

Have you been a wholehearted mother, but time, toddlers and teenagers have moved on? If you are wondering what comes next for you, you’ll feel right at home here.

Or, are you a mom for whom family life has been non-Pinworthy and parenting has been downright painful? I hear ya. There are many of us around.

Are you looking for a life full of exploration and adventure after the nest empties, but maybe you have no idea how to go about doing that? Stick around! We’ll explore adventures together to help you gain more clarity for your own path.

After a couple decades of writing books and articles about parenting, homeschooling and adoption, speaking to homeschoolers and other parent groups, and reaching out to the mom in the trenches who was trying to make the best of it - my kids grew up. Some grew up and grew away. I was determined to find a way out of the pain, emptiness and lack of direction.

For many of us, the journey starts with something we moms are not accustomed to. After years of caring for and serving others, sometimes we forget the beauty and wonder of US. We need to spend some time getting to know the parts of ourselves that have lain dormant, and take the time to explore interests and passions that we set aside.

I’d like to invite you to get the “What’s Next for Mom” workbook and jump into this growing tribe of Moms who are emptying the nest and filling the life! Let’s reignite your Mojo after Mothering!
Read More…

Search the Blog

Want to Search For Something?

Disclosure

Real Mom Life is a participant in the Amazon Services LLC Associates Program, an affiliate advertising program designed to provide a means for sites to earn advertising fees by advertising and linking to amazon.com.

Footer

About Christine

FacebookInstagrammailPinterestYouTubeTwitter

At Real Mom Life, my passion is to provide resources and reassurances for moms facing the surprising challenges of family life. In my writing and speaking, I explore solutions to unexpected issues in adoption, homeschooling, special needs, and more while encouraging moms to extract the maximum joy out of each day. Read More…

Real Mom Life

Real Mom Life

107 N. Pierce Ave.

Wheaton, IL 60187

Copyright © 2021 Real Mom Life on the Foodie Pro Theme