When was the last time you were kind to yourself?
It’s an important question as self-kindness is important. You will already understand the importance of being kind to others, perhaps by showing appreciation to the people you know for the things they have done for you, and forgiving them when they have let you down.
But when have you shown kindness to yourself?
It might seem like a strange question but if you rarely focus on your own needs, now might be the time to focus on yourself for a change.
3 Reasons Why Self-Kindness Is Important
You deserve to pamper yourself
You can get a lot of satisfaction from making other people feel good but you deserve to feel good too. It’s not selfish to make yourself feel happy, as you need respite from the pressures and stresses that might sometimes get you down. When you treat yourself, in whatever way is relevant to you, you will nourish your need to be looked after and cared for. By doing so, you may be able to alleviate your anxieties and low moods and improve the way you feel on a daily basis.
Other people aren’t always kind
Sadly, kindness from others isn’t always a given. You’re fortunate if other people do offer kindness but it might be that the people in your life don’t show it often enough. It might even be that there are people you know who are anything but kind, being quick to anger and harsh judgments before any kind of nicety. If this is true, it’s especially important that you show kindness to yourself. When you’re surrounded by people who aren’t kind, you need to show it to yourself for the sake of your mental wellbeing.
You will set a good example
A lot of people neglect the need to be kind to themselves. They don’t buy themselves nice things, schedule in me-time, or take as much care of their health as they should, for all kinds of reasons. But if you can show them that self-kindness is possible, they might follow your good example. In this way, you are also showing them a kindness.
How To Show Yourself Self-Kindness
It’s possible to get into the habit of self-kindness by doing various things on a daily and weekly basis. The following are just a few examples so consider applying them to your life.
Forgive yourself often
You’re not perfect. There will be times when you make mistakes. However, you shouldn’t let these mistakes rule your life. The key is to learn from whatever you have done and move on. And moving on is only possible after you have forgiven yourself. So, if you’re currently weighed down by mistakes of the past, forgive yourself for them. And if you screw up today, don’t go to bed with a heavy heart. You’re human so you won’t always get things right. Live each day doing the best that you can and use these methods of self-forgiveness if you ever start to experience the pain of your mistakes.
Look after your physical health
You only have one body so don’t hurt it in any way. Resist the urge to eat junk food for your meals or to binge-watch Netflix all day. Treat your body well by nourishing it with the foods that will improve your health. And take time out to exercise each day to ensure you remain fit and healthy. This is one way to show kindness to yourself but this can be extended. When you’re eating and exercising to stay healthy, you don’t have to bore yourself in the process. Show kindness to yourself by eating nutritious foods that you know you will enjoy and exercise in fun ways. Staying healthy doesn’t have to be a chore so explore all of your options.
Buy yourself something that will make you feel good
When did you last go shopping for yourself? If you’re a mom, it’s likely that most of your shopping is for your kids, especially when it comes to clothes and entertainment options. But you deserve nice things too so make a wish list of things that you would like to buy. You might buy yourself something stylish to wear, for example. How about a new jacket? Or a new top? Or a cool set of shades akin to THE ICONIC sunglasses? When you look good you will feel good too, so if your current fashion sense doesn’t do it for you, consider a change. There are all kinds of other things you could buy for yourself of course, so while you shouldn’t blow your weekly budget, you should still buy something affordable or save up for the nicer things in life.
Have a self-care day
You’re not being selfish when you have a self-care day. There’s nothing wrong with taking time out from your mom life for a day that is focused on your own needs for a change. You need the opportunity to recharge your batteries, experience moments of calm and peace, and have time for the activities that you enjoy doing. There are all kinds of things you can do on your self-care day. You could take a relaxing bath, book a massage, spend time with your hobbies, take time out for a nap, and much more besides. There are some ideas in the previously linked article so schedule in me-time when you can and enjoy a day that is all about you!
Get the help you need
Are you struggling in any area of your life? There’s no need to be ashamed if you are because, as we said, you’re human! If you’re having problems with your health, seek out the relevant medical professional, be that a doctor, therapist, or any kind of specialist. If you’re having issues at work, speak to your boss or any other person that can support you. If mom life is taking its toll, call in a childminder or a relative that can give you a little bit of respite. In short, don’t struggle alone. Life isn’t always easy so there’s no harm in asking for help when you need it.
Pat yourself on the back
Instead of focusing on the things you haven’t done well, concentrate on the things you have. Especially if the people in your life aren’t forthcoming about recognizing your achievements, you owe it to yourself to be self-congratulatory. One way to do this is to add post-it notes to your wall or fridge that highlight the things you have done well. You will then have reminders of your successes, no matter how large or small they are, and have reason to feel good about yourself. Going back to a previous point, you could also buy yourself something to celebrate what you have done. So, if you have excelled at work, for example, you might want to treat yourself in whatever way is relevant to you when you have returned home.
What Can You Do Today?
You will understand kindness from the perspective of the way you treat friends and family members. And it might be that you have already done something in the way of kindness for them today. That’s great news if so as not only will you benefit their lives, but you will also do much for both your mental satisfaction and your reputation if you have taken time out to be kind.
But considering the point of this article, remember that today is also a day when you should find ways to be kind to yourself. We have listed a few ideas but there may be other things you could consider. So, be proactive and do something in the way of self-kindness today, and don’t put it off until tomorrow. When you get into the habit of doing something now, you will have more inclination to care for yourself in the future.