Do you feel challenged in your marriage communication?
We may actually BE from different planets. Some days you wonder.
A friend shared recently his feeling that nothing he did seemed to make his wife happy. He would make attempts, but they were never quite good enough.
My own husband’s words came back to me: “I try to do what you want me to, but I’m damned if I do and damned if I don’t.”
I’m trying to understand what that means.
Let’s look at some hypothetical scenarios.
Wife says, “I’d like you to spend more time with the kids.”
Husband’s response: He buys a new TV.
Wife’s response: “Honey, I’d still like you to spend more time with the kids.”
Husband’s response: “There’s no pleasing you! I’m damned if I do and damned if I don’t.”
Can you relate? Do you have these conversations? What’s really going on here? Is our misunderstanding of one another so severe that it does indeed seem like we’re from other planets?
Let’s take another example:
Wife says, “Honey, could you please patch that little hole in the bathroom wall? I want to repaint soon.”
Husband’s response: He caulks the window.
Wife’s response: “I appreciate that honey, but I need that hole patched so I can paint.”
Husband’s response: “I try and I try and I try to make you happy and you’re never happy with me.”
Am I the only one? Have you had this happen? Got a story to tell?
Let’s see if we can figure out what’s going on here.